mementomori | September 20, 2007Just when you thought the highly evolved hominids occupying this planet have reached the nadir of lunacy, often described as a point so low no living being could go any further without drawing comparisons to a Monty Python sketch, comes this report:
A Venezuelan man who had been declared dead woke up in the morgue in excruciating pain after medical examiners began their autopsy.
Those of you who watch the late, late show on television might recall that the beginning of an autopsy usually involves carving the front of the body from chin to groin like a jack-o-lantern, which makes the lead…
mementomori | September 18, 2007Things Overheard in a Hospital Cafeteria:
1. "I don't know what he was talking about - it wasn't that cold in the hall."
2. "Say, what does 'S.O.S.' mean on the menu?"
3. "The doc says whitening her teeth may not be enough to get her a modeling job."
4. "I wonder why he asked you to bring him a pack of cigarettes?"
5. "He sure seemed in a rush to be discharged, didn't he?"
6. "She said she was still constipated so I gave her an extra dose."
7. "I'm running way behind today - I hope my patients aren't in a hurry."
8. "Did you hear they're opening a medical spa inside of a Wal-mart?"
9…
mementomori | September 17, 2007My fellow SciBling Orac has commented once again on the case of Starchild Abraham Cherrix, the 17 year old man with relapsed Hodgkin lymphoma who rejected potentially curative therapy (called "stem cell transplantation") in favor of alternative/unproven therapy and localized radiation therapy. According to interviews Mr. Cherrix and his radiation oncologist have given to the AP (why a patient would let his oncologist continue to spill such intimate details of a controversial treatment to the mainstream media is beyond me - doesn't anyone value privacy anymore?), his latest x-rays show that…
mementomori | September 13, 2007Men become accustomed to poison by degrees.
-Victor Hugo
"Cephalon says improper use of pain medication caused deaths in cancer patients"
FENTORA (fentanyl buccal tablet) is a potent opioid analgesic, intended for buccal mucosal administration. FENTORA is formulated as a flat-faced, round, beveled-edge white tablet.
FENTORA is designed to be placed and retained within the buccal cavity for a period sufficient to allow disintegration of the tablet and absorption of fentanyl across the oral mucosa.
FENTORA employs the OraVescent® drug delivery technology, which generates a reaction that…
mementomori | September 10, 2007The US Senate is looking at a bill that would force pharmaceutical companies to disclose any payments or gifts they make to doctors.
Apparently a few Senators are upset that physicians might prescribe medications for patients not just because they are effective, but also because the docs want to reward Big Pharma for sending over a baksheesh, or in the eyes of the Senate a large envelope stuffed with unmarked bills. Hey, I'm all in favor of an open policy when it comes to informing patients of why we recommend certain treatments. If a company is paying me to place patients on a clinical…
mementomori | September 9, 2007You can't leave, 'cause your heart is there
But you can't stay, 'cause you been somewhere else!
You can't cry, 'cause you'll look broke down
But you're cryin' anyway 'cause you're all broke down!
-Sly & the Family Stone
(From the Department of Common Sense:)
"Testing patients' families could prevent 850 heart attacks a year"
A new Scottish study concludes that the "close relatives" of a heart attack patient are at increased risk of also suffering a coronary event and might avoid this fate by reducing their risk factors, excluding the factor entitled "positive family history of heart…
mementomori | September 6, 2007"Doctors who score poorly on communication more likely to generate complaints"
Doctors who score poorly in the communication portion of a skills examination they take before becoming licensed are more likely to be the subjects of complaints to regulatory authorities later when they're practising physicians, says a new Canadian study.
Good evening, class. Today's lecture is entitled "How to Develop A Winning Bedside Manner." I see that the room is filling up - could some of you in the back please move up front? C'mon, don't stand back there like a bunch of f***ing morons - get down here and…
mementomori | September 4, 2007Sometimes oncologists spend the day performing strictly as oncologists - asking questions, listening, poking, inspecting, talking on the phone, giving orders, looking at x-rays or arcane columns of numbers. The casual observer might characterize this routine as akin to watching a cat in the middle of its siesta. I believe the term is soporific.
Ahem...no offense taken; in fact, we call this "Having a good day at the office."
Despite the urge to get down on bended knee and ask for every day to be like this, all docs worth their salt know that such prayers will fall on deaf ears. The…
mementomori | August 31, 2007Two consulting groups hired by Ohio State have issued reports stating that a major expansion of the OSU Comprehensive Cancer Center (called "The James") may be delayed by "infighting" between leaders of the cancer hospital and the main medical center.
Uncertainty over the project's direction -- including debates between officials of the university's medical center and its cancer hospital -- probably will delay the project past its target completion date of 2011, a top school official said yesterday.
Experts hired to examine the plans for the medical center also said the infighting could hurt…
mementomori | August 30, 2007"Second-hand smoke to kill 2 million Chinese"
The more I hear about what is going on in China, the more I wonder if the goons running that country have any clue about the health catastrophe lurking at the palace doors.
Dr. Peymane Adab and K.K. Cheng of Britain's University of Birmingham, with colleagues in Hong Kong and Guangzhou, used data from a study of 20,430 men and women over the age of 50. Most had never smoked.
"More than half of never smokers reported exposure to passive smoking in their workplace and at home, with 28 percent reporting high levels of total adult exposure," Adab and…
mementomori | August 28, 2007Wee-Dram-Upon-the-Rocks, Scotland, 1768 - Dr. Fergus McGregor, a well-known general practitioner from Edinburgh, has moved to this charming village in the Highlands in order to escape the overwrought lifestyle of the city. He announced his decision to his wife on that fateful day by stating "As lang as ye stand ye dinna stay," which she misunderstood as a request to make him a haggis-and-peanut-butter sandwich. After lunch, though, she agreed to his scheme and within the month they set off in their carriage to this delightful destination, certainly more melodious on the tongue than its…
mementomori | August 26, 2007200 scientists attended an international conference in Chicago this last week in order to sniff out the latest research on a ubiquitous health disorder.
"We want to advance the science in this field," said Christine Wu, a researcher at the University of Illinois at Chicago, who helped organize the conference.
[The disorder] is neglected because it is not a disease that will kill people," she said in an interview. "But it's a huge problem. Everybody suffers from [the disorder] at one point in their lifetime."
The treatments for this malady range from over-the-counter medicines to an overhaul…
mementomori | August 23, 2007Diseases desperate grown
By desperate appliance are relieved,
Or not at all.
-Hamlet, Act IV, scene iii
Desperation, one of the fiercest of emotions associated with life-threatening illness, sometimes ignites inside of patients and sometimes just slowly kindles to flame. No matter with what speed it travels its ultimate goal is to scorch the hope we need to persevere when faced with a disease such as cancer.
As a health care provider (formerly known as "physician") one of my duties is to try and douse anguish before it holds "illimitable dominion over all," as Poe would say. This of course…
mementomori | August 20, 2007In a significant policy change, Bush administration officials say that Medicare will no longer pay the extra costs of treating preventable errors, injuries and infections that occur in hospitals, a move they say could save lives and millions of dollars.
Bravo! It's about time the government started sticking it to hospitals that don't care about the preventable errors, injuries and infections that occur in hospitals. Not paying for the cost of care associated with preventable errors in hospitals is one way to send a message, although I would have preferred public hangings, which is a much…
mementomori | August 19, 2007"Better to hunt in fields for health unbought than fee the doctor for a nauseous draught. The wise for cure on exercise depend."
-John Dryden
I have never been on a deer hunt but I care for a lot of patients who are avid hunters. Missouri, as you may or may not know, is blessed with a plentiful deer population, and my folks take advantage of this every fall. This may be just a weird coincidence, but I often wonder how some of my patients resurrect the stamina needed to stalk, shoot and field dress a buck while living with cancer. Of course they have help from their fellow hunters, but just…
mementomori | August 17, 2007Things you don't want to hear while interviewing a new patient:
1. "Oh, I must have forgotten to write that down."
2. "My neighbor swears by it so I started last year."
3. "My father? Uh, he died young."
4. "I like it when you return my calls promptly."
5. "I know - no one ever believes me. But, here - I'll show you."
6. "I want you to have these handouts I found on the internet."
7. "My son wants you to call him - he worries about me."
8. "That's my wife, Doc - not my mother."
9. "You look cute in that shirt and tie."
10. "This is the first time I've left my house since 1956."*
*…
mementomori | August 14, 2007Ever wonder what goes through the mind of someone smoking their first cigarette? I've often wondered what first-time smokers think of as they light up:
"I'm so excited."
"This tastes weird."
"I hope I'm doing it right."
"Finally I fit in."
"Better not mess with me anymore."
"This is relaxing me."
"It's so cool!"
"Dear (insert name here - Mom, Dad, Teacher, Police Officer, etc.): Go F*** Yourself!"
I wish I knew, and not just out of a morbid interest in consumers who willingly buy a highly addicting product designed to slowly ruin their bodies, if not take their life. I can't imagine that…
mementomori | August 13, 2007"West Nile Virus Season Starts In New York City"
This message is published not just as a service to the fine residents of New York, not just because your narrator made it out of LaGuardia today without making any involuntary blood donations to Culex pipiens, not just as a reminder to all the ScienceBloggers headed there this weekend to keep a sharp ear out for calls of "Bring out your dead!" while strolling around the sidewalks of New York.
This message is a thank you to the Agricultural Research Service of the USDA, which developed DEET as an insect repellent after World War II. There are…
mementomori | August 9, 2007[Editor's note: The C. O. is jetting off to New York for the weekend (just one week before the big ScienceBloggers get-together - so much for timely planning). To kill time he asked us to reprint this little reflection, written on July 24, 2005 while he was vacationing Up North. So while he visits some of the Big Apple's world famous attractions (without his laptop, alas) we give you this fluff.]
Five generations of my family have summered up here in the northern aspen and beech forests. Strolling around the sparse, loamy grass, or lounging by the water under the soft shade of the pines,…
mementomori | August 8, 2007patience (definition no. 1): the quality of being patient, as the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like.
Some are just born with it.
Some never are able to acquire it, reminding observers of a copperhead immediately after being stepped on.
Some wield it with apparent ease, hiding the scars that bear witness to the recalcitrance in learning it.
Some have it land on their shoulder like a butterfly, only to see it flutter away before leaving any of its magic.
Some can produce it continuously, as if from a limitless…