Weirdness
pharyngula | April 27, 2007How confusing: remember the story about the convert to Judaism who was trying to compel his adolescent son to be circumcised? I was persuaded by others that the story was almost certainly an urban legend, but now it turns out that there really is a pending court case that fits the particulars. The Oregonian reports the details, but leaves out the names of those involved (the accusation that this was faked was in part based on the similarities of the names to those in a work of fiction with a similar premise; could it be that the fictional names were used because they fit the story?) In…
pharyngula | April 27, 2007We've finally found something crazy enough to make a Utah Republican to back away. One of their district chairmen, Don Larsen, has proposed an interesting resolution.
"In order for Satan to establish his 'New World Order' and destroy the freedom of all people as predicted in the Scriptures, he must first destroy the U.S.," his resolution states. "The mostly quiet and unspectacular invasion of illegal immigrants does not focus the attention of the nations the way open warfare does, but is all the more insidious for its stealth and innocuousness."
Whoa … he's got Satan herding Mexicans across…
pharyngula | April 27, 2007I greatly admire their perseverance…it seems a shame to chop them up this way.
But life will find a way to eat just about anything.
pharyngula | April 25, 2007This is too absurd to be true.
As you know, Daylight Saving Time started almost a month early this year. You would think that members of Congress would have considered the warming effect that an extra hour of daylight would have on our climate. Or did they?
Perhaps this is another plot by a liberal Congress to make us believe that global warming is a real threat. Perhaps next time there should be serious studies performed before Congress passes laws with such far-reaching effects.
I'm suspicious — a little digging revealed that there really is a Connie M. Meskimen in Arkansas … a lawyer. It…
pharyngula | April 25, 2007The most important battle in the history of mankind!
A bit more than a week ago, I mentioned this interview I did for a site called One Blog A Day. The comment thread on the interview has grown in a peculiar way — John A. Davison and his pet sycophantic monkey, VMartin, are babbling away in a most painfully lunatic fashion, cruelly egged on by wÒÓ†. It's hard to beat this comment for delusions of grandeur:
Martin and myself are waging a very effective war against the forces of darkness on both sides of this idiotic debate, sides which are dead wrong and always have been. Our success is…
pharyngula | April 24, 2007Bwahahahaha! At least … we have a source for Kryptonite!
Researchers from mining group Rio Tinto discovered the unusual mineral and enlisted the help of Dr Stanley when they could not match it with anything known previously to science.
Once the London expert had unravelled the mineral's chemical make-up, he was shocked to discover this formula was already referenced in literature - albeit fictional literature.
"Towards the end of my research I searched the web using the mineral's chemical formula - sodium lithium boron silicate hydroxide - and was amazed to discover that same scientific…
pharyngula | April 12, 2007People who have seen your photo and know your name might notice you when you pick up two-dollar hookers in the seedy part of town.
Another useful hint: when said observers later mention this fact, it is not a convincing disavowal to state that you do not hang out in the red-light district "on a regular basis."
(Hat tip to Zeno for providing this fabulous PSA. I note that Zeno is pseudonymous and does not have his picture on his blog.)
pharyngula | April 11, 2007Uh, right. That line comes from a story in a 1949 issue of Mechanix Illustrated, "Octopus wrestling is my hobby".
The story involves a ferocious octopus with 25-foot long arms that fought an entire village of people armed with clubs, knives, and spears—the description of the battle isn't at all clear, but it sounds like the monster is coming to the surface in shallow water and fighting all these people milling around. It's a very silly story.
It was difficult to spear the octopus if it were far back in the coral caverns. But Roo had his own system for drawing the creature out. Retreating a…
pharyngula | April 11, 2007What little I've read of the extreme audiophile community makes my brain hurt, and I've avoided it like poison. James Randi deals with the freaky audiophiles now and then — people who believe their special magic cables will make your stereo sound better, or that an array of weirdly shaped hatstands in your room will make the music resonate just right — but it's not something I want to get into regularly. A reader sent me a link to the special One Drop Liquid, though, and I just had to share my cerebral agony with everyone else, out of spite.
I dare you to make sense of this. It's some liquid…
pharyngula | April 10, 2007
The title of this article is terribly misleading: "The Octopus that can open drink bottles". I was thinking it would be so cool to have an octopus on your shoulder, and you hold up your beer bottle, and he reaches out an arm and twists the top off for you. And then you read a little further and discover that the little smart-aleck will only do it if you open it first and put some octopus food inside for it. I wouldn't mind a bit of shrimp or crab bobbing about in my beer, but having to open the bottle first to put it in there defeats the whole purpose of carrying a bottle-opening octopus…
pharyngula | April 9, 2007Hey, maybe this fits into the framing debate. The famous violinist Joshua Bell stood in a Washington DC subway station, playing Bach on his Stradivarius, in a test to see how many commuters would stop and appreciate the magnificent music.
A few people stopped, but no crowd formed, and he got a total of $32.17 tossed into his violin case. That actually isn't bad for 45 minutes of playing, but I suspect he isn't going to give up his day job.
pharyngula | April 7, 2007From Geoff Arnold, it seems there is a cult of Schneier. Since I said hello to Bruce Schneier in my brief visit to Minicon yesterday, I feel that I am obligated to set the facts straight. It's all true. He is a god among men, and the earth would tremble at his footsteps if he wasn't so beneficent that he insisted on levitating himself everywhere.
Speaking of deities on earth, I also got to briefly meet Teresa Nielsen Hayden at her panel on conversations on the net. Yes, in person, she is exactly like she is on the web, only more so. Somebody interrupted her, she raised a finger, and with a…
pharyngula | April 7, 2007His people are starving, and Kim Jong-il is roaming the countryside, eating up giant rabbits.
Karl Szmolinsky of Eberswalde faces a grim Easter.
His gold medal pride, 'Robert der Grosse' , the largest rabbit in recorded Prussian history , is missing and believed dead in North Korea.
The 24 pound UberBunny was sent to Pyongyang last year along with 11 others "with the aim of setting up a breeding program to alleviate famine " , but they ended up on the table at Dear Leader Kim Jong-il's February 16th birthday banquet.
This is what happens when megalomaniacs rule — not even the bunnies are…
pharyngula | April 3, 2007
Those wicked farkers have taken this charming photo of a clutch of innocent cephalopod embryos and … and … oh, I cannot even describe the perversities they have wreaked upon them.
Do you think if I work up a good head of outrage, I'll be able to get on Fox News, get a few people fired, and shut down the obscene display? Billy Donohue, if you're reading this, give me a call … I need tips.
pharyngula | April 2, 2007I'd been kinda hoping to be Inara, but this is good enough.
Your results:You are Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)
Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)
75%
Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)
75%
Wash (Ship Pilot)
70%
Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic)
55%
Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)
30%
Jayne Cobb (Mercenary)
25%
River (Stowaway)
20%
Derrial Book (Shepherd)
15%
A Reaver (Cannibal)
5%
Alliance
5%
Inara Serra (Companion)
0%
Honest and a defender of the innocent. You sometimes make mistakes in judgment but you are generally good and would protect your crew…
pharyngula | April 1, 2007Sure, you can talk while looking at this page, but it's even funnier to have it loaded while someone else is talking to you. (My wife is going to kill me now.)
(via Present Simple)
pharyngula | March 30, 2007Minneapolis is a lovely city, except for the geysers of blood erupting out of the sewer system. Don't get the wrong idea, though—only some of it was human blood.
pharyngula | March 30, 2007"There's something enchanting under his sari!"
What is this, silly religion day? I just got sent a link to this marvelous story of a young unemployed British fellow who became a goddess in India — he is now the incarnation of Bahucharaji, the patron of Indian eunuchs, and he goes around blessing people and curing their infertility. Apparently, Bahucharaji was an Indian princess who castrated her husband because he wasn't interested in sex, and for that she was deified. Thank Lakshmi and Urvasi my wife is an unbeliever!
They call him Prema, for short. It means "Divine Love." Hey, what a…