In which I answer the questions posed in the titles of some scientific articles in a generally snarky and sarcastic manner

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Let's be morbid, shall we? Van de Putte D, Ceelen W, Gillardin JM, Pattyn P, de Hemptinne B. Attempted Suicide by Auto-Injection of Polyurethane (PU) Foam: Report of a Case. J Trauma. 2007 Jun 1; [Epub ahead of print] No abstract available. I'm not sure how this would work. Where exactly did it get…
Hadi HI, Quah HM, Maw A. A missing tongue stud: an unusual appendicular foreign body. Int Surg. 2006 Mar-Apr;91(2):87-9. Mmm...appendicitis. --- Das G, Rawal N, Bolton LM. The case of the missing "Prince Albert". Obstet Gynecol. 2005 May;105(5 Pt 2):1273-5. Okay, can someone attempt to explain to…
Arora A, Arora M, Roffe C. Mystery of the missing denture: an unusual cause of respiratory arrest in a nonagenarian. Age Ageing. 2005 Sep;34(5):519-20. A nonagenarian is someone between 90 and 100 years old. That's really old. Behold the power of swallowing a loose denture: It got stuck in her…
Santucci RA, Deng D, Carney J. Removal of metal penile foreign body with a widely available emergency-medical-services-provided air-driven grinder. Urology. 2004 Jun;63(6):1183-4. Dude! Remember that one time when they had to remove that barbell from my dick with an air grinder? That was so sick…

To coulter or not to coulter

Don't know about your political preferences, but I stay the fuck away from that psycho bitch.

Heh, I still have a portfolio case given to me by a Coulter representative.

We were using the Coulter counter to count blood cells, and the rep was there to help teach us how to use it. While in the middle of a tricky separation, I didn't notice her walk up behind me until she asked how I was doing. Caused me to leap a good six inches off the workstool, which scared the heck out of her too.

She gave it as a prize for managing a successful seperation despite nearly throwing the equipment across the room. =/

Can I try?

Comparison of a manual and an automated method to estimate the number of uterine eggs in Anisakid nematodes: to coulter or not to coulter. Is that the question? J Parasitol. 2007 Apr;93(2):423-5.

It should say "Is that a question?" The answer to the question is "no", that is not a question; it doesn't even have a question mark.

I vaguely remember (sorry.. can't find a citation right now) a study that the VA did a few years back. They found (IIRC) that when errors were promptly and openly admitted, that lawsuits actually went down. I think it was at least partially that (family of) patients felt as if they weren't being lied to, and were therefore more forgiving and less vengeful. As I remember, it also meant that common mistakes were identified and ways to prevent and/or mitigate them could be worked on.

But.. you'll never get a lawyer to agree with this position.

-- mitch