Freaks of Nature

The fear mongers over at National Geographic are at it again. They have released what they claim to be actual prehistoric photographs of nightmarish creatures. Just think of your most feared animal and combine it with either a cooking utensil or a wood shop tool. That might give you an idea of how National Geographic came up with these things.

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The CraftsMan-Eating Shark, known for its ability to sever the limbs of its victims with a straight or beveled cut.

I smell "evolution" and I don't like it.

I came up with one of my own:

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check out the rest here.

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ZOMG I love it.

Real or not, you gotta love Helicoprion.

I believe that shark was featured in one of the old Showa-era Gamera movies. Remember? Gamera vs. Helicoprion? That buzzsaw actually zooms around, slicing giant turtle limbs to and fro. In one particularly gross scene, Helicoprion was seen slicing up a Gyaos bird, who made pitiful screeching noises as if to say "Not again!*"

*Only Gamera fans will enjoy these jokes.